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  • Does religion matter to you?

    Do you live for religion or religion lives in you? Alright, we don't talk about muslims. Let's talk about chinese. Chinese can have different religion, Buddhism, Taosim, Christian and catholic. But then is is necessary to have religion?

    Take it for one example :

    Most christian would like to hang out with the same religion as them. But if one day, a guy and a girl like each other, but the guy religion is buddhsim or catholic, but the girl's religion is christian. Will it because of religion they disagree to be together or one of them sacrifice and join the other religion, or maybe both gave up their religion.

    I know it's quite hard to give on its belief. So I'm a free-thinker here. Hopefully can see some comments
    Last edited by saresha; 26-11-2005, 05:33 PM.

  • #2
    As a buddhist, it would be best to have a partner in the same religious belief as most would perceive as having less conflict.

    But I do know a couple who are a buddhist and a catholic each. Both are extremely devout to their religion and at the same time very loving to each other. Their secret to their marriage is respect, communication, acceptance and open mindedness. Religious conversion is not in the books for them.

    There is one thing that transcends all belief, and it's call 'LOVE'. Loving yr enemy or love yr neighbours reflects in real life, walking the talk.

    I wouldn't mind taking a partner in other religion, but no conversion please. Thank you. Take me as I am, that's 'ALL'.

    I would go to church sunday service with him and I expect the same for him reciprocate and follow me to buddhist sunday service; on alternative weekends that is....

    Religion has always been a sensitive topic, hope there can be a open and constructive exchange here.

    No flaming please.

    Last edited by alba; 19-11-2005, 04:16 PM.

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    • #3
      gee.. sensitive topic here..
      for me.. i hang out with people of all religions.
      my friendships and other acquaintances do not depend on religion...
      whether i like a person or not depends on his or her character...
      but i draw the line when people be acquaintances or strangers start to "preach" or asking me to attend some of the church services..
      sorry.. i will reject flatly..
      i respect your religion.. and its only fair that the other party should respect mine and not "psycho" me into converting...

      but i guess the tricky part comes into play when two parties are in a long term commitment..
      i know people caught in such situations..
      i have friends who converted to muslims or christians as their respective partners require their spouse to be of the same religion...
      those who were unwilling to convert had to end the relationship...
      for me.. i come from a conservative family..
      hence it would be expected of me to find a partner of the same religion...
      just my

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      • #4
        i believe all religion are good and i respect all of them. i'm a buddhist and i hang out with people of all religion. as long as respect and understanding is achieved withing every friendship and relationship.
        in fact my bf is a muslim but we did not insist on who's gonna follow who's religion in the future. he even followed me to temple whenever i'm praying and i would not eat in front of him when he's fasting. we just accept each other differences with open heart..

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        • #5
          I think respect plays a BIG part in making a relationship works. I feel that religion is just a spiritual comfort for human beings and as long as the religion is preaching good values and good guidence to its believers, it should be respected. Religion only gets complicated when man complicate it. Some religious people insist on the fact that only they are the true religion and the others are cults and that's when complication arises. I think religions are just like human races. We have different races living in harmony with each other and respect each other so why can religions do so?

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          • #6
            Personally.. i'm a christian.. so i would choose a guy who's a christian also.. so our religion wont clash.. cause for me, religion is a big part of my life and i would love to share it with the guy i love the most..

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            • #7
              Hmm, guess i can't comment much since i'm a freethinker & so is my SO.. Personally, i feel that even though compromises can be made when both halves of a couple belong to different religions, it can put a strain on the relationship too.

              I used to date this guy who was a staunch Catholic & i hated it when he'd drag me to church all the time & forced to attend services/sermons when i wasn't even keen on it. The last straw came when he tried to force me to convert. That's why i walked out eventually, cos i'm just not ready to commit to any religion as i still haven't discovered what i really want.

              No offence to any Christians/Catholics here, i'm not trying to say that all church-goers are like my previous date, but the point i'm trying to reiterate's that i do respect people's choice of religions, but not to the extent that i'm forced to convert. That's when i get really turned off.

              Thankfully, my SO's a freethinker, so @ least the pressure from the religion aspect of the relationship's waived. That said, i do have many friends who're dating SOs who belong to a different religion & things are looking good for them too. So eventually, it still depends on how a couple works things out together & how willing they're to accept each other's differences.

              Just my

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              • #8
                Personally I have known of couples who broke up because of religion, most of the time its the Christian wanting the partner to follow. I think Christians are kind of forceful when it comes to religion, trying to convert everyone. I wish they can be more respectful of others.

                I feel that its good to have a religion but not to force your friends or partner to follow, simply not so nice. Should be a more accomodating world

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                • #9
                  its usually the muslim and christian but saying this aloud might cause a lot commotion in this thread. I hope it will not be locked due to sensitivity.

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                  • #10
                    erm..sensitive topic here. for me, i would most likely not date a guy who isnt a christian. Cos religion plays a big part in my life. I want my future children to grown up with the right values of a christian. And if i get a guy with a diff religion, they might be confused. The same goes for my SO, esp so since he's a born christian.

                    But as for friends, i dont care what religion they're from as long as they're nice peeps. And i dont force or try to convert my friends. I dont even ask em to any church events. But as my bf, obviously it's a diff story. Cos he might be the one spending the rest of his life with me.

                    Now my bf and I face a prob. We're both christians. But we're from diff churches. And i like my church very much and he's very close to the pals from his church. So we dont know which church we should both go to. And in future if we're married, which church we should bring our kids to. haha im thinking too far.

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                    • #11
                      it happens.

                      i'm pretty sensitive abt this as well. I am open to all religions when it comes to spouse choosing, but my spouse shouldn't force me to convert and should respect my religion.

                      Anyway, with regards to Christians, I have this friend who told me she is willing to give up any guy no matter how much she loves him, so as long as he is not a Christian, even though he might be supportive of her religion. As long as he's not a Christian, it's nono.

                      Thankfully, my boyfriend supports my religion, and even sends me for religious meetings and supports my participation in NDP and Chingay with my religion, although he comes from a Taoist family. In addition, he also told me that in the future, if we have kids, they shall go to my religion. I was like YIPPEEE!!!

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                      • #12
                        Wow!!lulufey, that's great!!! its show that there is always possibility that relationship can survive even between different religions. If you don't try, you never know.

                        I wonder if there is any problem if one is christian and one is catholic? should have no problem right? other than goes to different churches.

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                        • #13
                          Religion doesn't really matter to me initially because I believe that love knows no boundaries. But having dated a Christian left a bad taste in my mouth. I have been avoiding getting into exclusive relationship with Christians thereafter. No offence, my very good friend is Christian too.
                          I'm a born Buddhist but seldom involve myself with any religious activities, I don't consider myself a free-thinker either. I just want hope that whoever I go out with will not coerce me to do anything with regards to any religion. I am not even a faithful person to my religion. The most I can to is to read up more and understand more. But too bad that didn't work out.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by fornight
                            Wow!!lulufey, that's great!!! its show that there is always possibility that relationship can survive even between different religions. If you don't try, you never know.

                            I wonder if there is any problem if one is christian and one is catholic? should have no problem right? other than goes to different churches.
                            The Christian & Catholic faith are different. Christians do not acknowledge/pray to Mother Mary, while Catholics do. This is but one of the differences. My SO is a Catholic, and is hoping I will convert to his faith.

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                            • #15
                              I think its best that you know what you want for your bf or gf so that you would not clash in future. Like you know you can't accept a non Christian then go and date a Christian.

                              Personally I am a Buddhist, in name, hee.. But I don't mind going for services when one of my girl friends ask. I find the services quite enlightening in some ways, because the teachings don't apply only to Christians but to humankind as a whole, like how to a good person that kind. Hoever, I alwayz explicitly tell my friend not to try to convert me

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